If you diet, you will fail…and it’s not even really YOU failing, it’s the diet and your basic human biology trying to keep you alive.
I work with women who have spent a giant portion of their lives dieting, and it never surprises me that most of them come to me as a last ditch effort because they’ve tried everything else, and feel like big, fat failures. They’re desperate to find something that’ll actually stick long term and give them the results they’ve sacrificed so much in the past for.
It’s not a surprise to me because I’d been there myself – time and time again – and because I know by listening to someone else’s plan and rules to tell you what your body should eat, and when, and how much, is not a recipe for sustainable results and success.
It’s also not a surprise to me that when I bring up the concept of intuitive eating (the approach that is based around letting go of diets/calorie counting/deprivation in exchange for a healthier and peaceful relationship to food and your body…getting in touch and listening to your body’s voice, and using it to guide your eating habits), their first response is fear of failure.
I mean, if you can’t succeed with your eating with clear rules, how the hell are you supposed to do it without a ton of structure? Especially for someone who’s type A like myself and loves the idea of rules and lists.
Something to keep in mind: We’re all born with all of the wisdom we need to fuel ourselves efficiently and effectively. As a baby, you instinctively knew when your body needed to eat, and how much it needed to eat to keep yourself alive. You would cry when you were hungry, eat until you got full, then stop. What happens is with years of controlling, restricting, coping, binging and all-out-food and diet craziness, those signals get lost.
It blocks this inborn intelligence, and instead of listening to our wise and all-knowing bodies, what we do is we make ourselves crazy.
We then feel like we HAVE to rely on someone else or some plan telling us how and what to eat or we’ll go crazy on junk food. Feeding yourself according to external cues (like following a diet plan for example) goes against your body’s natural instincts and internal wisdom, it just doesn’t make sense!
On top of that – when you’re in the mindset of feeling like a failure from many tried-and-failed attempts at dieting, you also feel like your body is conspiring against you. You’re trying so hard to tell it what to eat, how much to eat, when to eat, etc…but for some reason it’s not working. Or if it does for a little bit, it hasn’t been a ‘forever’ habit and gotten you the results you wanted.
When you believe your body is the enemy and trying to sabotage you, it makes it hard to trust it! You think it’ll just tell you to eat pizza and cookies and cake all day long.
The GOOD news is – your body still instinctively knows exactly what, when, and how much it needs to thrive and naturally reach its happy & healthy weight. That’s what intuitive eating helps you re-discover.
No matter where you are today with your weight or down the diet-rabbit-hole, know that your body wants to be balanced. Your body wants to be healthy. Your body wants to feel fabulous! When we learn to listen to our body and learn to love ourselves enough to give it what it’s asking for, that’s when the magic happens.
Those who struggle most with intuitive eating are those who are most afraid of failure, and those that know it’ll be hard but trust the process anyway. are the most successful the fastest.
The thing is, it’s impossible to truly fail at intuitive eating. It’s a learning process at every point along the way. What used to be thought of as a set-back will instead be seen as a growth experience. You’ll get right back on track when you see this as progress, not failure, and it’ll propel your forward vs. drag you back.
If you’re going into intuitive eating with a fail/succeed mentality, then you’re still in diet mode and will probably experience the same outcome you’ve had with every other diet – bingeing, overeating, weight regain, and self loathing. If you think of it – the thing you are most afraid of has already happened, right? That’s why you’re afraid of it, because you’ve been there, and it wasn’t fun.
And even if you do, it’s a learning experience and potentially a wake up call to help you approach things differently next time 😊
If you’ve tried all kinds of diets, calorie counting, and restriction plans (like cutting sugar/carbs), are starting to realize there will never always be the perfect scenario in your life to ‘stay on track’ with them – but doesn’t know what else to do…
If you’re tired of feeling controlled and obsessed with food, and relying on your willpower all the time…
If you want to feel happy, comfortable, and confident with your body…
If you want to feel at peace with food – able to actually enjoy it again – guilt free…
Then I’d highly recommend you try the intuitive eating approach!
You know what to expect with diets. Intuitive eating is unknown, so it’s important to have a partner, a lifeline, and guide. That’s exactly what I do in my Health Coaching program! I’d love to set up a free phone consult with you. Click here to book yours to to see if we’re a good fit to work together
